Tuesday, June 24, 2008

life


well my life is all ups and downs im still wonder wads is love actually means i knw la two people that like care hurt comfort pamper each other...
its been so long but in this heart there is still a wound that is healing slowly..
but mentally it is emotionally its isnt.
its been many moons i act like nothing has happen..
its like now u have it and now u dont..
why is it my fault that all this happen?
i question myself...
o is it wad i did? act? o am i not pretty enuf!!!!!!!??
so wad everyone is diffrent in their own way..
i knw wads my weakness but u don have to use it against me rite??
it sucks when u do that.
i knw love is a very nice feeling...
bt when its heart breaking time...
4 example..
boyfriend cheated on u..
he breakup wit u 4 another guy
he dump u for some stupid reason
he control u too much
he is not understanding

everyone wants a perfect guy o girl
so do i but i knw everyone have weaknesses
well u should not be ashamed of it
if its bad try to change the time is still long
everyone can change into better
love come and go when it wants too no use holding on when its time to let go...

wooohooo...

starting.... its been a year

well its the starting of my blog..
its been a year since u are gone.. i still miss u.. everyone misses you..
my aunt has been suffer from cancer a very bad sickness.. but she was very strong to fight it for 30 years o more. with the support of her husband , foster mum, mum, us relative she was strong and go on fighting the sickness. my grandma told me that she was a very good daughter she work and earn money for the family when my grandpa has no job.they were 9 of them in the family including herself i really salute her b'cos she was so young bt that have to help my grandma support the family... her wish was to stay oversea and yes indeed her wish was granted.. everyone that knw her in new Zealand treat her well and love her.. she is also a good cook, well since she had the sickness she barely could eat anything.. all her fav food she cant eat, she bought the food jus to see us enjoy it... we celebrate her last birthday here in kuching.. she din dare to tell my grand ma abt when she is going to go but she told it to my aunt the second sister, the doctor told her that she must spend her last few months enjoying and do the things that she wanted to do. she was here for durian season we took her to go to serian and other place to have a trip. she bought alot of durians for us to eat well she wanted to eat but she cant. after that we did alot exciting things together, we celebrated my grandma birthday.. that was the last birthday that she celebrate my grandma birthday.. after a few days it was my aunt birthday we celebrate it by having dinner and all my cousin play around and get together. after a few days, she was admited to the hospital.. that was pretty serious cos she was having nose bleeding and caughing blood she was at the hospital for few days.. after disscharge from t he hospital she was getting ready to go back new zealand after a few days.. than the day has come.. she left us and went back to new zealand.. after one month she went back to new zealand, she was admited to the hospital that last year around last month.. she knw that her time was comming but she was strong she keep holding on till my grandma reach there, my grand me was there for like 2 or 3 weeks plus to be with her.. we talk to her tru webcam she gone so so skinny im felt so so sad...
after a few days around early june, she was in a coma she was there for 3 days 2 nites.. every one was hopping that she could wake up.. but she din... she pass away with a gentle smile on her face.. my grandma was so upset and unc.. my aunt was cremate and brought back to kch.. my uncle's eyes were pretty swollen so was my grandma.. we were all strong in heart and mental
we know that she suffer alot and she had to go.. her time was up.. i pray for her to rest in peace and be remind she is always in my heart no matter wad.. i pray for her amen.. i love u...